Sunday, April 30, 2006

Happy 9th Birthday Jacob!!

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

When I was a kid!!

If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!!

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning . . . uphill BOTH ways . . . through year 'round blizzards. Carrying their younger siblings on their backs . . . to their one-room schoolhouse, where they maintained a Straight-A average, despite their full- time, after-school job at the local textile mill . . . where they worked for 35 cents an hour just to help keep their family from starving to death!

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it!But now that I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalog!!There was no email! We had to actually write somebody a letter . . . with a pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself! Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up! And talk of about hardships? You couldn't just download xxx! You had to steal it from your brother or bribe some homeless dude to buy you a copy of "Hustler" at the 7-11! Those were your options!

We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it! And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your bookie, a collections agent - you just didn't know!!!You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!

We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like "Space Invaders" and "Asteroids" and the graphics sucked ass! Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination!And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died!! Just like LIFE!

When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy or some old broad with a hat sat in front of you and you couldn't see, you were just screwed! Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 15 channels and there was no onscreen menu and no remote control! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little brats!

And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up, we had to use the stove or go build a frigging fire. Imagine that! If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot. That's exactly what I'm talking about!You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980!!!!!

I had to post this, I thought it was funny & very true!! Take care everyone!! Love always, MM XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Harley Davidson inventor

The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven.

At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur, "Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."

Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang out with God."

St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God.

God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so you were the one who invented the Harley-Davidson motorcycles, eh?!"

Arthur said, "Yeah, that's me..."

God commented: "Well, what's the big deal in inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution, and can't run without a road?!"

Arthur was apparently embarrassed, but finally spoke, "Excuse me, but aren't you the inventor of woman?"

God said, "Ah, yes."

"Well," said Arthur, "professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention:

1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion;
2. It chatters constantly at high speeds;
3. Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much;
4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust;
5. And the maintenance costs are outrageous!!"

"Hmmmm, you may have some good points there," replied God. "Hold on."

God went to his Celestial super-computer, typed in a few words and waited for the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and = God read it and smiled.

"Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to Arthur,"but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Mike Bibby

My son Jacob, is a Big time Sacramento Kings fan. When I heard that Mike Bibby, a player from the Sac. Kings was going to be in Elk Grove at the Verizon store on Laguna Blvd, I knew I had to take him. It was today at 6pm to 7pm!! So right after school today, I took him & we stood in line for an hour & a half before he was able to meet him & get his flag signed by him. He was so excited when he got up there to see him, he froze when Mike Bibby said hello to him, all he did was smile, lol. It was too cute!! I got a few pictures of him in line before he met him, then while he was getting his flag signed, & when he was talking to him. It was the best two seconds of his life!! It sucked that after waiting almost two hours to see him, he was only able to visit with him for less then 30 seconds. Oh well, He said it was still worth it!! I would do it all over again just to make him happy. Enjoy the pictures!!
Take care everyone!! Love always, MM XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Saturday, April 15, 2006


I hope everyone has a wonderful Easter Sunday!!

For the love of EASTER, Please dont make the Easter Bunny cry. This Easter sunday please enjoy yourself, & that'll make the Easter Bunny Happy. :)

Stay safe this Easter & beware of the Easter Bunny!! LOL!!

Take care everyone!! Love always, MM XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Crazy shit is going on around here........

This afternoon I left my place to go get something to eat with my boys, since its their Easter Vacation (Spring Break to everyone else). When I was leaving my place, I saw what looked like a bunch of cops just hanging around on their phones, right outside across the street in a parking lot by my house. Then it hit me, I remembered hearing a helicopter earlier this morning. I remembered hearing them saying something over a loud speaker saying something about if you see such & such person, please call your local sheriffs department. I was half asleep when they were saying all this, so I dont really remember everything they said. It was all very muffled at the time because I was half asleep when all this was happening. So I just didnt think anything of it & went back to sleep. Its pretty normal to hear sheriffs flying around looking for someone who they were chasing around on the streets, so again I really didnt think anything of it.
Anyways, I continued to drive along with the boys to go get something to eat for lunch. Then when we were driving back up to the house, I noticed there was a lot more people, cars, vans, & sheriffs. They had taped off the road in a certain spot, which I couldnt help but drive slower then when I was leaving. Thats when I looked over to where they were all standing & noticed a dead body laying next to them. I think I stopped breathing for about a min or two or three. To be honest I m not quite sure how long I stopped breathing. I immediately told the boys not to look & then I tried to stay calm myself. I am not feeling real well right now & I m not feeling very safe in my own home right now. I know this happens almost everyday in California, but this is just too close to home for me. Seems like Ill be moving once again!! UGH!!
I would have posted pictures, but when I walked up to speak with a sheriff to see if he could tell me what had in fact happened, I soon found out they didnt want anyone around the crime scene.
They dont want anyone to know anything at this point other then becareful because the killer is still on the loose. Crazy if you ask me!! I will however see if I can take a picture when some of them leave.
But anyways, I do hope everyone is doing well!! Do take care everyone & stay safe!! Love always, MM XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

My Baby Girl

Monday, April 10, 2006

New Rules for 2006

George Carlin's New Rules for 2006

New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad for! There's a reason you don't talk to people for 25 years. Because you don't particularly like them! Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days: mowing my lawn.

New Rule: Don't eat anything that's served to you out a window unless you're a seagull. People are acting all shocked that a human finger was found in a bowl of Wendy's chili. Hey, it cost less than a dollar. What did you expect it to contain? Trout?

New Rule: Stop saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. I have a better description of these kids: lucky bastards.

New Rule: If you need to shave and you still collect baseball cards, you're a dope. If you're a kid, the cards are keepsakes of your idols. Ifyou're a grown man, they're pictures of men.

New Rule: Ladies, leave your eyebrows alone. Here's how much men care about your eyebrows: do you have two of them? Okay, we're done.

New Rule: There's no such thing as flavored water. There's a whole aisle of this crap at the supermarket, water, but without that watery taste. Sorry, but flavored water is called a soft drink. You want flavored water?Pour some scotch over ice and let it melt. That's your flavored water.

New Rule: Stop f***ing with old people. Target is introducing a redesigned pill bottle that's square, with a bigger label. And the top is now the bottom. And by the time grandpa figures out how to open it, his ass will be in the morgue. Congratulations, Target, you just solved the Social Security crisis.

New Rule: The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the asshole. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a "decaf grande half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet-n'-Low and one NutraSweet," ooh, you're ahuge asshole.

New Rule: I'm not the cashier! By the time I look up from sliding my card, entering my PIN number, pressing "Enter," verifying the amount, deciding, no, I don't want cash back, and pressing "Enter" again, the kid who is supposed to be ringing me up is standing there eating my Almond Joy.

New Rule: Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn't make you spiritual. It's right above the crack of your ass. And it translates to "beef with broccoli." The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren't pregnant. You're not spiritual. You're just high.

New Rule: Competitive eating isn't a sport. It's one of the seven deadly sins. ESPN recently televised the US Open of Competitive Eating, because watching those athletes at the poker table was just too damned exciting.What's next, competitive farting? Oh wait. They're already doing that. It's called "The Howard Stern Show."

New Rule: I don't need a bigger mega M&M. If I'm extra hungry for M&Ms, I'll go nuts and eat two.

New Rule: If you're going to insist on making movies based on crappy, old television shows, then you have to give everyone in the Cineplex a remote so we can see what's playing on the other screens. Let's remember the reason something was a television show in the first place is that the idea wasn't good enough to be a movie.

New Rule: No more gift registries. You know, it used to be just for weddings. Now it's for babies and new homes and graduations from rehab.Picking out the stuff you want and having other people buy it for you isn't gift giving, it's the white people version of looting.

I hope everyone is doing well!! I got this in an email & I had to share it, I hope you enjoyed it!! Take care!! Love always, MM XOXO

Friday, April 07, 2006

I hope everyone is doing well!!

Sorry, I havent been posting anything the past few days, I havent been feeling well. I ve been doing a lot of resting, nothing much else. Although, I have been trying to check out everyones blog as much as I can, to see how everyone is doing. I really do hope everyone is doing better then me.!!Have a wonderful weekend everyone & take care of yourselves!! Love always, MM XOXO